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Submitted on
May 12, 2013
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The Valiard Mansion - Chapter 5 by The-Ez The Valiard Mansion - Chapter 5 by The-Ez

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Theodore and Adam finally travel to the Valiard Mansion for their first day of work. What will they find there? And is it really haunted? :giggle:

My longest chapter yet! :w00t: :XD:

Any and all input very welcome. Thanks for bearing with me, guys! :hug: :heart:


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3Fangs Featured By Owner Jun 9, 2014
I admit my only complaint with these last two chapters has been a lack in art within the document itself...but your gallery leaves plenty to be found, so it's a minor complaint. ;)
The plot thickens!! Now we have met the character of the Mansion, if such a house may be deemed a "character", which I think in this case it surely must be.
I like that you have a limited set so far, we're not jumping around to a lot of different locations. And the pacing is still as strong, neither too fast, nor too slow.
Yes. Adam CAN be a trifle annoying at times, but that's really just his personality and age. I love how all your characters are depicted with their own unique personalities, that each differ so strongly from each other. It really makes them stand out.
Heh, I kinda feel sorry for Theodore--I'm sure Adam is hardly what he'd want in an apprentice! :doh:
The-Ez Featured By Owner Jun 9, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Yeah, I struggle to find time to do the illustrations in between university and now work. And at the same time, I can't let readers wait just because I'm hogging the chapters to finish the drawings. Drawings are ancillary anyway. It's the story that is of paramount importance.

Thanks for your input on Adam. I get worried that people might find him too annoying, though they should find him a little frustrating at least. :XD: Thanks so much!
3Fangs Featured By Owner Jun 10, 2014
Aye, and besides, once the story is complete, THEN you can add the art in. Design a nice pdf for printing. :nod:
As long as we're told the story NOW, we can appreciate the art LATER.
(And as I said, if readers are really dying for some character art, you have a gallery full of it!) :aww:

Personally I find you manage a good balance with Adam--he's just frustrating enough, but in en entirely believable way. It's his personality and age.
(If he weren't that way, he wouldn't be his own character, or serve the plot the way he does.) ;)
I wonder if he'll go through any changes by the end of the story? Learn any lessons and perhaps grow up a little bit, eh?
goldenliar1 Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
are you confused with your career options?
the writer/artist thing?
The-Ez Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks so much for taking the time to read this! :glomp: :heart: Please let me know if you notice anything that's wrong or stupid. I'm still learning so I appreciate any input! :w00t:

And naw, I'm not confused with my career options. :meow: I know exactly what they are and I choose to ignore most of them. :evillaugh: I'm going to keep doing lawyer stuff for the foreseeable future, hopefully go into litigation. It's easy money. :D
goldenliar1 Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
The career thing was a joke.

Your story is awesome!
Keep waiting for the ghosts!!
MalbonDesigns Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2014  Student Digital Artist
This story is so wonderful!
MalbonDesigns Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Daily92 Featured By Owner Jan 25, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
OMG, OMG, OMG!!! The ending is so much OMG! Makes me want to read the next chapter as soon as possible!! La la la la 
Heavensbee Featured By Owner Oct 30, 2013  Hobbyist
YAAAAAY! Theodore's POV! And now I shall continue to read this awesomeness.
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